PARENTING STYLES – How to spot your style?

Parenting Styles
Parenting - Joint Responsibility
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Parenting Styles: Parenting is one of the most important and noble jobs in the world. I say this because parenting is one of the most challenging jobs. Do it right and a beneficial person to the society will be given. If not, the society will suffer. This should not discourage an individual from being a parent. With the ability to give proper love, care, and attention to a child thus will be the most enjoyable and rewarding experience.

Topics

  1. “What is parenting?
  2. The Evolution of parenting
  3. Types of parenting – Brief Outline
  4. Parenting styles – Explained
  5. How to spot the parenting style
  6. Suggestions and Tips to parents

What is parenting?

Parenting Styles
Parenting Styles- A joint responsibility

Parenting involves supporting and promoting the physical, mental, social, financial, and intellectual development of a child from pregnancy to adulthood.

It refers to the role of raising a child, ensuring a healthy development into adulthood. Parenting is all about embracing ourselves with the foremost thought of nurturing a child so he/she becomes an independent and responsible adult. This cannot be accomplished without applying ourselves with genuine love and care.

Parenting Styles

Evolution of parenting

In the 19th century parents who sought to learn more about childcare through books were disdained. Common sense seemed to be the solution to problems of childcare. This increased infant mortality, thus this finally led to do more research about childcare. Since then childcare had been given top priority within the society.

Types of parenting

This refers to the practices and strategies parents use in raising their children. These styles vary along two dimensions which is, how much you love and care for your child, and how much you are involved in the life of your child. Based on these, there are 4 styles of parenting

Parenting Styles
  • Authoritative Parenting
  • Authoritarian Parenting
  • Permissive Parenting
  • Uninvolved Parenting

Parenting Types – Explained

So, let us discuss what these styles are, what will be the outcomes of this sort of parenting, and what is the best-suited parenting style for you.

Authoritative Parenting

This type of parenting refers to having tremendous love and care while being highly involved in their child’s life, giving children certain demands and limits.

This can be viewed as a give and take sort of relationship.

Reward: According to research this is the best type of parenting. Children who are raised in authoritative parenthood tend to do great in school, have high self-esteem, have great social skills, and less involved with substance abuse.

Authoritarian Parenting

In contrast to authoritative parenting, this style is all about conformity and obedience. This again is High in control, or involvement in your child’s life while showing no, or less affection.

Flip Side: This type of parenting can cause a child to grow up anxious, withdrawn, and unhappy.

Note: Surprisingly this also depends on the environment the child is raised upon. If you are in a very bad neighborhood, then having this type of style is the best for the child’s growth.

Permissive Parenting

Here parenting is centered around the wishes of the child. Many demands and limits are made by the parent. The parent here tries to play the role of a friend rather than being a parent itself.

Flip Side: As you can see this type of parenting will lack the guidance a child needs to have a solid foundation in success.

Children raised will lack self-discipline and are associated with low grades and risky behavior.

Uninvolved Parenting

This type of parenting refers to uninvolved, indifferent, and neglectful behavior of parents towards their child. They do not respond to the child’s needs and make very few if not no demands.

Flip Side: This is the worst type of parenting style. This leads to children who are emotionally withdrawn, fearful, anxious and who perform poorly in school

How to spot Parenting Style

Authoritative Parenting

Parenting Styles
Family That Eats Together

Spot Phrase: “Let’s discuss this”

Demandingness, Control: High

Responsiveness, Warmth: High

Traits: Responsive, Reciprocal, Demonstrative, Nurturing, Affectionate, Flexible, Democratic, Sets clear standards etc…

Authoritarian Parenting

Spot Phrase: “Because I said So…”

Demandingness, Control: High

Responsiveness, Warmth: Low

Traits: Forceful, Autocratic, Rigid, Strict, Inflexible, Punishment Oriented, Gives Orders, Controlling Etc…

Permissive Parenting

Parenting Styles
Spoilt Brat

Spot Phrase: “Whatever you want…”

Demandingness, Control: Low

Responsiveness, Warmth: High

Traits: Accepting, lenient, indulgent, few or inconsistent boundaries, low expectations, Few rules, Etc.

Uninvolved Parenting

Spot Phrase: “Do what you want. I don’t care…”

Demandingness, Control: Low

Responsiveness, Warmth: Low

Traits: Absent, Neglectful, Uninterested, Few or no rules, No expectations. Emotionally distant, Self-absorbed, Etc.

Suggestions and Tips to parents

Parenting has no job description. Parenthood does not come with a manual. We may find great doctors, engineers, and teachers but, it is hard to look at parenthood in such a way.

We cannot assume that a parent who has raised twelve children is greater than the one who has raised a lesser amount than that. You can raise Ten children, nine may grow up well, and the 10th may cause you some problems along the way.

“The sign of great parenting is not the child’s behavior. The sign of great parenting is the parent’s behavior” – Andy Smithson, Author.

As you step into parenthood the first thing you should do is to reflect on yourself, your personality, and your character traits.

You must be a role model worthy of being imitated. An example is better than precept. This is very important because children learn new things by observing their parents. They picking up what you do. Who you are is a walk in the park for a growing child?

Here are some tips.

Types of parenting
Lead by Example
Parenting Styles

Instead of making the child do what you want, let the child decide what he/she is passionate about. Identify your child’s strengths and weaknesses.

  • Praising and rewarding is the best thing to do instead of punishing them. As you understand your child’s strengths, focus more upon them, and guide your child to reach his/her full potential. This encouragement will mean the world to your child.
  • Stop comparing your child with another, a common one being comparisons made between siblings. Instead magnify their uniqueness and appreciate them for who they are.
  • Every human is not the same, they all grow at different mental and physical pace. You must be patient and supportive in all situations. Any negative emotion towards them will make them feel worthless thus causing conflict and chaos within them coming to a point where nothing they do will make you happy.

There is nothing called “The perfect Parent”. It is a Utopian dream. However, it is important that you change yourself in a way you like and not by a standard set by society.

Stick to good values you like having in your life. This helps you create a perfect atmosphere at your home where your child can laugh, be happy, and disciplined at the same time.

So, once you realize that your child is a mirror of yourself it is easy to accept and embrace the little one to nurture their strengths and talents while focusing on the development process of your child.

We hope this blog has been helpful to you. Do share it with your friends and loved once so together we can make the words a better place one step at a time.

Let us know your views on this post in the comments below…

Thabitha David

Thabitha David

Mother, Wife, Daughter, Sister, Aunt, Friend. She is a MBA Graduate specialized in Human Resources. She is a very proud mother of 3 Kids. (2 Teens & 1 Tween). She is a keen Observer of Life and is a blogger. She writes these articles based on her experience (Success and Failures). She does this with hope to help and ease the pain of at-least one parent as they face the challenges of parenting. Read more from the About Us Page

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2 Responses

  1. June 19, 2020

    […] You will need to introspect and look at your parenting style and make appropriate changes if you feel you need to make. To get to know your parenting style better read our blog on PARENTING STYLES – How to spot your style? […]

  2. September 3, 2020

    […] you like to know more about your parenting style read article PARENTING STYLES – How to spot your […]

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